SWEET VALLEY HIGH FOREVER

Long ago I had a crush on a gal who told me that, during her tween years, she loved reading the Sweet Valley High books. For those unfamiliar… imagine tenacious detective Nancy Drew as twin sisters in SoCal who solve zero mysteries. They attend a rich kid high school, an exotic bubblegum paradise where every girl is a cheerleader, every guy is the star quarterback, everyone is blonde, and no one seems to do any homework.

Inspired by love for a girl I hardly knew, I created a radio play using Sweet Valley High characters: wrote it, scored it, built a multi-layered SFX landscape, AND performed all the voices. A massive effort. When it was done I consulted the Travis Bickle how-to classic “Misguided Romantic Overtures For Dummies: A Practical Handbook for Turning Your Psychotic Delusions Into True Love” — I copied the audio file to a thumb drive, tied it with a red bow and handed it to the girl. I was certain she’d jump for joy and marry me on the spot. Do I need to tell you I never heard from her again…?

This radio play WAS a dismal aphrodisiac, but I’m quite proud of the work I did.

LARRY & SAL

Larry & Sal are shark puppets. Larry is smart. Sal is weapons-grade stupid. My wife and I invented Larry & Sal to keep our young daughter entertained. Pretty soon we were making videos we claimed were for the kid, but they were really for us — two Gen-Xers who worship Henson and Oz. My wife & I improvised the dialogue and I edited all episodes myself.

THE SAL-9000

YOGA

DAY AT THE MUSEUM